Im stronger than it seems

Recently i started talking to this guy  and i really really like him,i already fall for him,but the thing is that i know he is not over his best friend.And he keep saying that he doesnt want to hurt me/get hurt and a lot of other things about himself that i really dont care.

Like he is not a good person,that maybe he is not good enough for me. Thats pure bullshit,im pretty messed up to.I got my own problems but when im with him im a totally different person,im caring,im positive,and i just want him to know how much i love him.

And its hard cause last night,on valentines day,we went drinking,he got drunk,he got into his “bitch mode”,we started kissing and well it didnt end up the way i would have wanted but i wouldnt change a thing about yesterday.

I got to see him almost the entire day,he is the first guy i ever hold hands in public,he is the first guy i ever kissed on the street,i was scared at first,but then i was just like fuck the world,im with him. I only wish to know if he would have kiss me if he was sober.

Right now i dont have much time to see him and he is going trought a lot of stuff and i cant go a day without talking to him,i dont want to rush things and blew things up,cause its been a really long while since i felt like this.

There is not a single moment of the day that i dont think about him.And i just hope one day we end up together.

He is a gym aholic and im fat,and ugly,im fugly,and i have seen his best friend and im like,what the hell does he sees in me? we look totally different.And he (W.) is a perfectionnist,dresses really well and i just take what ever comes and dress like what ever clean clothes i have on my closet. Our taste in music is a little bit similar,but thats all.I really dont know what i do standing next to him,but i know i want to be with him.

I never tought i would have more than 200 followers, i mean i dont reblog and i dont consider my blog insteresting at all.

Well thank you all people :) Ill try do my best,not like anyone cares…

And well anon or off you can ask anything anytime you want to.